Channel KGOD

Updated insider information by Chellie Campbell, author of “The Wealthy Spirit: Daily Affirmations for Financial Stress Reduction”

 

345 – December 11

“Two hundred seventy-eight channels and there’s nothing on. Time to turn on the God channel.”—Lisa Morrice

 

It’s hard for any one of those two hundred seventy-eight channels to hold my attention for long. I zip by them with my trusty remote, a kaleidoscope of whirling colors and images: Arctic explorers in a blinding snowstorm, “snow” on a channel that doesn’t come through, thoroughfares in downtown London, a Dove soap commercial (I watch to see their current trend; maybe I could do another commercial for them), sitcom, sitcom, cartoon, no, no, zip, zip, zip.

I stop at James Lipton interviewing Neil Simon on Inside the Actors Studio. I’ve seen it but I watch it again, because Neil makes me laugh. Bravo, Bravo. Commercial, zip, a gorgeous hunk throws another gorgeous hunk to the wrestling mat—ouch!—zip, a panting girl suddenly screams, a knife, blood—ick—zip! Zen music: I relax. The men and women on the Korean channel are gorgeous in their ancient regalia, but I don’t speak Korean and it’s subtitled in another oriental language. Zip.

A couple of religious channels, but the big hair is pink and the mascara’s running and I don’t think this is the God channel I’m looking for. Zip. Roy Dupuis, playing Michael on La Femme Nikita. Thud. Now there’s a God. I tape this to drool over later.

VH1 has the “whatever happened to” stories and they’re fun but I zip by after I find out David Cassidy is happy now. I’m glad. I met his mom once, Shirley Jones. Lisa Morrice and I had a singing gig at The Oaks spa in Ojai and I was singing my solo, Desperado, at dinner just as Shirley walked in with her husband, Marty Ingles. Perfect. The best soprano in the world walks in while I’m singing my toughest song…she was very gracious and complimented both of us. (I’m eternally grateful for that kindness, Shirley.)

Out of the depth of my reminiscent dream, a sudden thought freezes the remote in my hand.

I’ve had adventures. Why am I watching other people on television talk about their adventures? I need to go out and have more adventures of my own! And if I think I ever want to be on television myself, I’d better write about my adventures. Write. I can’t watch one more person, real or fictional, talk about the life I want to be leading. I need to lead it.

Channel KGOD has broken through. “This is the day that the Lord hath made. Let us rejoice and be glad in it.” I smile. I get up. I go. I write. Who knows? If I play my cards right, I may get to meet Roy Dupuis.

Today’s Affirmation: “I rejoice and am glad in the adventures of my day today!”

 

Well, this page is a clear illustration of my ADD tendencies. Hee. I admit I still love channel surfing and watching bits of lots of programs. When I’m home and there are two shows I want to see that are on at the same time, I tape one on the TV in my bedroom and watch the other one live in the kitchen.

Yeah, I said tape. I still have an old VCR and a bunch of blank tapes. I can’t bear the idea of buying a new electronic gizmo and having to read and master the manual. Chellie no hablo techo.

But there’s a more sinister reason. I don’t dare get a DVR. If I carved out time to watch everything, you’d never see me again. I’d turn into one of those pod people from “The Matrix”…

I admit to being an American Idol junkie – reminds me of my singing audition days as an actress, and I love watching those talented kids hone their skills as they compete. Glee gets a little silly but all those kids can sing! And I still get drawn in to Survivor and all the shifting alliances. Loved Pillars of the Earth miniseries – I’ve always been a fan of costume dramas. Howie Mandel is darling on Deal or No Deal but it was better when they were going for a million dollars. I can watch the History Channel anytime and find something interesting, and poker wherever I find it on the game channel or the World Series of Poker on ESPN. Of course I get all the premium channels so can always find a good movie…

So what do you like to watch?